Summer of Service

By Lacey Gunter

After hearing some lovely and inspiring women speak tonight I was reminded of the value of service in creating a happy life. It inspired me to again strive to do more service in my life.  Not only is this an important consideration for busy moms, but I believe it is critical for our children.

Our kid-centric parenting culture is obsessed with making sure kids are having fun. I feel we do a disservice to our children if we model that this is the only way to experience joy in our lives.  At this time of year when parents are anticipating summer and signing kids up for engaging summer and sports camps, and planning their elaborate vacations to theme parks and playlands, it might be beneficial to stop and think. Amidst all this time and resources we are putting into making sure our kids are brilliant, talented and fun-loving, are we putting in the same amount of consideration on how to help our kids become more thoughtful, generous and loving towards others?

I used to put together a summer play group for my kids and the kids in our neighborhood. I put a lot of time and effort into finding or creating fun and engaging activities for the group. But last year the thought occurred to me that maybe my kids need less awesome play-dates with their friends and more character building experiences helping those experiencing a trial or sacrificing for those less fortunate. So now I try to put together a kid friendly summer service group.

The first time I did it, last summer, I thought I needed to have projects that were big and certain to make a difference in many people's lives, which was a little challenging as I didn't have very many ideas for how a bunch of young kids could do that.  But overtime, I have realized that even small but personal acts of service can make a big difference in both the people you are serving and the children doing the service. Something as simple as drawing pictures and making love or thank you notes for the people in your neighborhood can create a feeling of love and happiness in your neighbors for several weeks or even several months. At the same time, it is a completely manageable task for even a toddler, with just a little parental help, that can spark a joy for service that will lead a child to want to do it again and again.

I am looking forward to doing a summer service group again this year. The projects probably won't be as big and monumental, but I am confident they will still be life changing. 

Because we're all in this together. Everyday.

Hello all, it's C.J. Schneider here.  Today I'd like to introduce you all to my dear friend Virginia Oviatt.  Virginia is a woman of many talents.  She competes in triathlons, she cooks, she manages twin babies, she sews flowers onto headbands, she fights lions with her bare hands...you get the picture.  She blogs at: https://missconginnyality.wordpress.com/. 

Because We're All in This Together.  Everyday. - by Virginia Oviatt

The parable of the Good Samaritan gets me every time.  I see myself so clearly- not in the the man left for dead (although somedays I may look it), not in the thieves who robbed and beat him (at least I try to not be that person). I am not even in the Priest or the Levite who avoid and ignore the hurt man. No, I am a character untold in the story but I am in there just the same. I am the Martha, busy with to her own children, so tired she cannot see straight, fighting  to get the laundry done, struggling to make sure there is fruit in the house, rushing to an appointment or lesson 10 minutes late. I am the one in the story who doesn't cross to the other side of the road. I, taking care of my own little brood, arms over flowing with babies, listening to the constant chatter of my little girl, trying to watch the never ending slap stick of my 8 year old, wanting to but never quite finding enough ways to  support and cheer on my hubs, I cross in the same place as the man. Failing to see him with my cognizant eyes, I take my daughter's hand to help her step over him and we trudge forward on our journey.

Last week I attempted my first large solo grocery trip with my 5 month old twins in tow. With one strapped to my back and the other snuggled in on my front, I had 2 hands free to load and push a very full cart. As I made my way through the store, the responses I got from other shoppers ranged from smiles, the woman cheering me on, whispering she can tell I'm doing an amazing job. There were countless strangers repeating the same tired phrase- "you've sure got your hands full" and the one man who went out of his way to ask "what would you do if you had 3?!?!"  But I was doing well with just my two. As I got to check out and just as I began to doubt, wondering how I would lift all my groceries out of the cart, bag and lift them back in again with my sweet babies clearly acting as obstructions, the customer service women left their station. Without asking what I needed said "we see you've got your hands full, let us unload and pack your groceries for you."
Later they helped me out to the van while I bounced and shooshed my little boys. In a store not generally noted for its customer service, They saw me and they knew what they could do.
From the drivers seat of my vehicle I called out how proud I was of the three of us. We did it! But without the help of these thoughtful women, I'm not sure I would have felt the same. They made the difference from it being a trip we just squeaked through to an experience of success I can look back to in those moments when motherhood successes seem far and out of reach.

I have a dear friend who recently threw her back out; On a Wednesday.
Wednesday night she bought the groceries we would need to make freezer meals.
Thursday morning she stood in my kitchen with her sore back chopping onions and filling bags. That afternoon she took my older two kids sledding.
Friday she came to visit and stopping in later to return something, noticed I was on my way out the door. I was late, trying to furiously get babies into snow suits so we could pick up my little girl from kindergarten. Her offer to stay to help meant that I didn't need to pack babies with me and could enjoy some 1:1 time with my sweet Lady.
Friday night with my husband away, she picked up the same daughter from a dance class and watched her until for me so I'd  have less running around with my two monkeys.
Monday, back still hurting, she came to pick up my older kids for an hour of physical activity after school.

Like me, This sweet friend has laundry, the need for fruit in her house. She has her own kids and her own projects. Though her back was hurting so she could hardly stand straight, she didn't cross on the other side of the road. She saw me and she knew exactly what She could do to help. 4 days out of 6 she checked in with me, included me in her day, served me, let me know she saw me and was there.

At our Relief Society March 17 party, the question was posed "who is an example to you of One who possesses Christlike attributes?"  I thought of my friend. I like to think I'm a person who enjoys giving service. I generally try to be kind and if I'm told what needs to be done, I'm your girl. But she has shown me what Brene Brown meant when she said "compassion is not a virtue- it's a commitment. It's not something we have or don't have. It's something we practice."
She has shown me what it means to practice constant watchcare. To be a Shepard, not just to the lost and lonely but to one of the 99 who just needs a boost, a little extra help to make sure she doesn't get too tired, too overwhelmed, too crazy. Like the ladies at Superstore, she allowed me to feel like more than just getting by, to feel I am handling my life with a little grace.

And so I'm committing to practice. To have my eyes open. To see and to do. Because the real challenge of the Good Samaritan is not in serving those you despise in the rare occasion you find them with a flat tire. It's in seeking and seeing opportunities to chip in, to lighten the load of others. It's in making kindness a part of everything; what we do; who we are; everyday.
Because we're all in this together. Everyday.

- Virginia Oviatt

Some Unexpected Gifts

By Lacey Gunter

These past three weeks I have undertaken the goal to complete a service marathon. When I started this adventure I assumed I was going to be the one doing the giving.  But I think I finally learned what Christ means in the scriptures when he says:

..and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it 

(Matthew 10:25)

I thought I was trying to make others feel happy, instead the gifts seemed to flow back to me.

The gift of love:  The world would have you think that joy is found when others love you.  But this equation is all wrong, No matter how hard we break our backs trying to get others to love us, it is out of our hands. We cannot make another love us, it is theirs to give.  True joy comes when we choose to love others. This is something we can control. We can fill our whole soul up with love, love we radiate and give to others, rather than love we take.

The gift of gratitude: Opening my eyes to find people in need and help them has actually attuned my vision to see the innumerable ways I am being watched over, blessed and helped. By learning to serve as Christ does, we start to see what Christ has actually done for us. I truly stand all amazed! As if those blessing weren't enough, this gratitude itself is a gift. It makes everything in life a little sweeter. It is like rose colored glasses.

The gift of peace: When life became stressful and chaotic, or the world seemed more terrible, doing service for others brought me peace.  You would think that adding one more to-do on an already backlogged list would just lead to frustration and exhaustion. But when I took the time to stop and really let myself get immersed in even just a simple act of service it really felt more like a reprieve.


I am so grateful I have taken this journey! And I wish you all peace, love and gratitude in your lives.