Murmuration

- a post by Jeanna Mason Stay

Birdwatchers, don't hate me if I'm wrong.
I'm 98% certain this is a European starling.

The other day the family and I were sitting in the kitchen when I looked out our window and saw a huge flock of starlings descend on our lawn. They stood around pecking for food, and we all watched them happily for a few minutes when suddenly, in one massive coordinated effort, they all took flight, moving in the same direction, so utterly synchronized. It was incredible to watch.

Just a few days later, I ran across an NPR article about this very phenomenon. It's called a murmuration, and the article has a cool video of one. The article talks about some scientists who have studied murmuration, one of whom calls the phenomenon a "remarkable ability to maintain cohesion as a group in highly uncertain environments and with limited, noisy information," to see how the starlings can be so unified. It turns out that they believe that each starling pays attention to the seven starlings nearest them and flies with them.

It made me think about a number of things, some of which I am still considering. So I'll leave you to consider some of the same questions.

Who am I flying with? Who are the people nearest me? And are they flying in directions I want to go?

Am I providing a lifting, positive direction to those who might be watching me? How can I be a better influence or help to those in my closest circles?

My friend Derrill thought of Laman and Lemuel in the Book of Mormon, who spend most of their time murmuring—complaining and performing all of their tasks grudgingly. He made this awesome Mormonad: Murmur not! Murmurate! So the question is, which do I do?

Of course every metaphor breaks down somewhere, and for me one of the breakdowns is that we are meant to be individuals, not starlings. But we are still meant to work together towards common goals and lend one another strength. So I think there's enough here to make the metaphor interesting and worth some thought.

What lessons do you think we could learn from the starlings?

I Heard the Bells.....

by Jewel Leann Williams

So I'm sick today. My back hurts and I have a sore/goopy throat and... blechhh...  so, that could have something to do with my state of mind. 

But... well, I'm sad. It's the state of the world, the state of the people in it.

I feel like what the Pope said. Yeah, I'm quoting the Pope:

There will be lights, there will be parties, bright trees, even Nativity scenes – all decked out – while the world continues to wage war. It’s all a charade. The world has not understood the way of peace. The whole world is at war,

Seems kind of harsh coming from one of the preeminent leaders of Christianity in the world.

I don't think Christmas is all a charade, but I feel a little of the... I don't know, the hopelessness, the tiredness--how long will we keep hoping, praying, working for peace?

It reminds me of the song "I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day" which actually comes from the 1863 poem "Christmas Bells" by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.

The story behind the poem is heartbreaking. Longfellow's son had been severely wounded in the Civil War, and his wife had recently passed away. Longfellow was looking around at Christmas preparations, and saw the same thing--a charade.

And in despair I bowed my head;
"There is no peace on earth," I said;
"For hate is strong,
And mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good-will to men!" 

I feel ya, Hank. I am disheartened by not just the wars. Not just the shootings. Not just the flood of refugees from multiple countries. It's more than that.

It's the generalized hatred I see almost everywhere. Or maybe not hatred, but contempt for everyone. People will jump right on down the throats of anyone who does not echo their opinions (or often, even those that do). Traffic--oh my goodness, I've been certain I was going to witness vehicular homicide like 10 times in the past week alone. Shopping. The news. The Internet. It's everywhere.
Hate is strong, and hate does mock the song--the prayer--of "Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men."

So do we give in?

Longfellow's lament was answered in the next stanza:

Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:"God is not dead, nor doth He sleep;The Wrong shall fail,The Right prevail,With peace on earth, good-will to men."

Again, I agree with Longfellow.

As much as I don't feel it right now, I know, in my heart of hearts, in my bones, that the right WILL prevail. Love really will, eventually, conquer all.

God is not dead.

Christ IS NOT dead.

I hang on to that knowledge.

Because Christ was born, and died, and lives(!), all that is wrong with the world will be made right.

It is the answer to the lament: "Christmas is a charade"

With Christmas, we celebrate the hope that is Christ. We acknowledge that even among all of the human-frailty-inspired hatred and chaos of our fallen world, that we can find peace in Jesus Christ.

He lives. Because of that, Christmas will NEVER be a charade.

Comment below: How do YOU maintain the Christmas spirit, even among the sadness and chaos of what's going on in our world today?

The Truest Sacrifice

I’m going to begin with a reboot of the story of the Rich Young Ruler.

The not-at-all rich, not at all young, Mom prayed to ask the Lord, “what shall I do to inherit eternal life?” He answered, “Thou knowest the commandments. Love God, love thy neighbor, No killing, no stealing, no adultery, be honest…”

The mother interrupted and said, “Lord, I do all of that stuff (remembers the "be honest" thing)—or at least, I’m trying my hardest. What else do I need to do? What’s the secret?”

The Lord said, “Maybe thou shouldst go read what Joseph Smith said about sacrifice.”

Among many things about sacrifice that the Prophet Joseph Smith said, here are a few (from Lectures on Faith 6):

“An actual knowledge to any person, that the course of life which he pursues is according to the will of God, is essentially necessary to enable him to have that confidence in God without which no person can obtain eternal life … and unless they have an actual knowledge that the course they are pursuing is according to the will of God they will grow weary in their minds and faint … and it is through the medium of the sacrifice of all earthly things that men do actually know that they are doing the things that are well pleasing in the sight of God. …“It was in offering sacrifices that Abel, the first martyr, obtained knowledge that he was accepted of God. And from the days of righteous Abel to the present time, the knowledge that men have that they are accepted in the sight of God is obtained by offering sacrifice.“But those who have not made this sacrifice to God do not know that the course which they pursue is well pleasing in his sight; for whatever may be their belief or their opinion, it is a matter of doubt and uncertainty in their mind; and where doubt and uncertainty are there faith is not, nor can it be. For doubt and faith do not exist in the same person at the same time; so that persons whose minds are under doubts and fears cannot have unshaken confidence; and where unshaken confidence is not there faith is weak; and where faith is weak the persons will not be able to contend against all opposition, tribulations, and afflictions which they will have to encounter in order to be heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ Jesus; and they will grow weary in their minds, and the adversary will have power over them and destroy them.”

That’s a lot. It's deep stuff. The gist is that we can’t know that what we are doing in our lives is exactly what the Lord wants us to do, unless we offer up to Him everything that we have, and are. And if we aren’t utterly confident that our course in life is pleasing to God, we can’t have absolute faith. If we don’t have that faith, we will falter and risk being overcome and losing our way.

What are we willing to sacrifice? What do we hold back from the altar? 

I know that there are times I am terrified that Heavenly Father will ask me to let a child go.

When Simon was a newborn, I would sit in the chair and feed him or rock him, and I sat there sobbing, holding a perfect little baby, so grateful to have him, yet so afraid that it was only until Heavenly Father figured out that he was missing: 

(imaginary Heavenly Father conversation:)

Hey! Where'd Simon go? (muffled angel answers)

What? Who sent him down there?  I miss him! Bring him back, NOW!

Yes. I was truly convinced that any moment, I would have to give him back. And it still scares me to think of losing any one of my children, or my husband. I'm pretty sure I'm holding them back from the altar, or at least using my biggest puppy dog eyes and looking up at Heavenly Father begging him to not have that be something asked of me. So I am well aware that I may be lacking in the "willing to sacrifice" department. 

Some sacrifices are harder to make than others. 

I like the story of King Lamoni’s father. When he was taught the Gospel, he cried out in mighty prayer, begging to be saved, and promised to “give up all his sins” to know God. 

Are we willing to sacrifice, to give up, our favorite sins? This is what Moroni calls “denying yourselves of all ungodliness.”

Doctrine and Covenants 121: says:

“Let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God; and the doctrine of the priesthood shall distil upon thy soul as the dews from heaven. The Holy Ghost shall be thy constant companion, and thy scepter an unchanging scepter of righteousness and truth”

Speaking of how our righteousness impacts our confidence, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland told this story. He says:

The conference concluded with a testimony meeting in which a handsome, young returned missionary stood up to bear his testimony. He looked good, clean, and confident—just like a returned missionary should look.

As he began to speak, tears came to his eyes. He said he was grateful to stand in the midst of such a terrific group of young Latter-day Saints and to feel good about the life he was trying to lead. But that feeling had only been possible, he said, because of an experience he had had a few years earlier, an experience that had shaped his life forever.He then told of coming home from a date shortly after he had been ordained an elder at age 18. Something had happened on this date of which he was not proud. To this day I do not know the nature of the incident, but it was significant enough to him to have affected his spirit and his self-esteem.As he sat in his car for a while in the driveway of his own home, thinking things through and feeling genuine sorrow for whatever had happened, his nonmember mother came running frantically from the house straight to his car. In an instant she conveyed that this boy’s younger brother had just fallen in the home, had hit his head sharply and was having some kind of seizure or convulsion. The nonmember father had immediately called for an ambulance, but it would take some time at best for help to come.“Come and do something,” she cried. “Isn’t there something you do in your Church at times like this? You have their priesthood. Come and do something.”His mother didn’t know a lot about the Church at that point, but she knew something of priesthood blessings. Nevertheless, on this night when someone he loved dearly needed his faith and his strength, this young man could not respond. Given the feelings he had just been wrestling with and the compromise he felt he had just made—whatever that was—he could not bring himself to go before the Lord and ask for the blessing that was needed.He bolted from the car and ran down the street to the home of a worthy older man who had befriended him in the ward ever since the boy’s conversion two or three years earlier. An explanation was given, and the two were back at the house still well before the paramedics arrived. The happy ending of this story as told in that testimony meeting was that this older man instantly gave a sweet, powerful priesthood blessing, leaving the injured child stable and resting by the time medical help arrived. A quick trip to the hospital and a thorough exam there revealed no permanent damage had been done. A very fearful moment for this family had passed.Then the returned missionary of whom I speak said this: “No one who has not faced what I faced that night will ever know the shame I felt and the sorrow I bore for not feeling worthy to use the priesthood I held. It is an even more painful memory for me because it was my own little brother who needed me and my beloved nonmember parents who were so fearful and who had a right to expect more of me. But as I stand before you today, I can promise you this,” he said. “I am not perfect, but from that night onward I have never done anything that would keep me from going before the Lord with confidence and asking for His help when it is needed. Personal worthiness is a battle in this world in which we live,” he acknowledged, “but it is a battle I am winning. I have felt the finger of condemnation pointing at me once in my life, and I don’t intend to feel it ever again if I can do anything about it. And, of course,” he concluded, “I can do everything about it.”

Are we willing to sacrifice our favorite sins in order to have confidence in front of our Heavenly Father? 

I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God,
 that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice,
holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.

Elder Neal A Maxwell said, “The submission of one’s will is really the only uniquely personal thing we have to place on God’s altar. The many other things we ‘give’ … are actually the things He has already given or loaned to us.”  

The Savior taught the Nephites after his resurrection:

“Ye shall offer up unto me no more the shedding of blood; yea, your sacrifices and your burnt offerings shall be done away. … And ye shall offer for a sacrifice unto me a broken heart and a contrite spirit. And whoso cometh unto me with a broken heart and a contrite spirit, him will I baptize with fire and with the Holy Ghost” (3 Nephi 9:19-20).

To have a broken heart and a contrite spirit is to be humble and receptive to the will of God and to the counsel of those He has called to lead His Church. It also means to feel deep sorrow for sin and a sincere desire to repent.

The prophet Lehi emphasized the importance of offering this sacrifice: “Behold, [Christ] offereth himself a sacrifice for sin, to answer the ends of the law, unto all those who have a broken heart and a contrite spirit; and unto none else can the ends of the law be answered” (2 Nephi 2:7).

Those who show their willingness to sacrifice as the Lord has commanded will be accepted by Him. He taught in Doctrine and Covenant 97:8: “All … who know their hearts are honest, and are broken, and their spirits contrite, and are willing to observe their covenants by sacrifice—yea, every sacrifice which I, the Lord, shall command—they are accepted of me” (D&C 97:8).

Elder Russell M. Nelson has taught: 

“We are still commanded to sacrifice, but not by shedding blood of animals. Our highest sense of sacrifice is achieved as we make ourselves more sacred or holy. This we do by our obedience to the commandments of God. Thus, the laws of obedience and sacrifice are indelibly intertwined. … As we comply with these and other commandments, something wonderful happens to us. … We become more sacred and holy—[more] like our Lord!” (“Lessons from Eve,” Ensign, Nov. 1987, 88).

I love what Elder Neal A. Maxwell said:

“Real, personal sacrifice never was placing an animal on the altar. Instead, it is a willingness to put the animal in us upon the altar and letting it be consumed!” 

It is my hope and prayer that each of us, and especially myself, can place the parts of ourselves, the natural man, the animal, upon the altar and let go of our sins. I know that the Savior has already paid the price to have our sins be consumed and to purify us so that we can be clean. I know that as we sacrifice whatever it is that the Lord asks of us, --even our favorite sins-- that we will be strengthened and perfected. 

Discouragement and Enlightenment: Teaching a Lesson I Needed More Than Most

By Jewel Leann Williams

I teach Relief Society. It is possibly one of the most treasured callings I have ever held as a member of the Church. Even years ago, when I was the counselor over the teachers, I assigned myself to be the substitute teacher whenever anyone was out for the day. I just LOVE teaching Relief Society. I think the reason why is because it not only “forces” me to delve into the topic and matter at hand, but I also have an extra measure of the Spirit to guide me and so I learn that much more. I read the lesson weeks in advance and ponder it for the month. Usually something happens in my life or in the world to give me perspectives on how best to teach the topic for the sisters I am privileged to teach.

Well, not this last lesson. I’d read it—and felt extremely guilty and terrible about myself.

I pondered it all month, as I tried desperately to live some of the principles taught.

I was a complete and utter failure at that, as well.

I read it again, and felt like the weight of the world was pressing down on my shoulders.

The topic:  The Sacred Callings of Fathers and Mothers (Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Ezra Taft Benson)

I cried when I read it. Every time. It felt like I was being slapped in the face. Every time. It is really a beautiful lesson, but it wasn’t that kind of crying. It was the kind of crying that comes along with this (partial) text message I sent to my husband:       

           

     “I am ashamed of us.”

That’s what it boils down to. The lesson talks about all these wonderful things mothers and fathers are to their children. I looked at it and saw everything I was doing wrong. I won’t get into all the specifics, and CPS doesn’t need to be called, don’t worry, but I was just flooded with the thought:

           

     “You are not good enough.”

So, Sunday rolled around, and before I even got up, my heart was pounding in my throat and I was fighting back tears. I played a recording of “Love is Spoken Here,” and I couldn’t stop crying long enough to speak. The first sentence out of my mouth, in that squeaky croaky voice of someone trying not to cry, was something like, “I am having a very hard time teaching this lesson, because I am an absolute failure at just about everything this lesson teaches.”   Within the first 5 minutes I used my whole stash of Kleenex and moved on to a baby wipe from Abby’s diaper kit.

There were a lot of really good comments made and we had small group discussions about some points—I mean, my husband is the Sunday School president and taught me the cool “new” way to teach, so it wasn’t that I wasn’t confident in that part of the lesson. I just felt like a big, fat hypocrite.

The last comment of the lesson was given by the mother of my son’s best friend. She is “that” mom. The one whose house ALL of my boys want to go to all the time. They would never come home if I didn’t make them. Her kids are awesome, and she always has it together. Really. When we talk, she tells me how she doesn’t have it together, but when I compare us, she is doing all the things right that I’m doing wrong.

Her comment went something like this, and I’m totally paraphrasing:

            

    “The first thing you said in this lesson was how you are a failure as mother. You need to stop, because this is the devil telling you how you are not good enough. Heavenly Father does not want you to feel like that. All of us feel like we are not doing enough, like we’re not good enough, and that’s wrong. We need to build each other up and not let Satan tear us down by making us feel like we’re not enough. One of the things I love about you is how amazing of a mom you are. Of course there are things we can work on, but I’m here to tell you that you are good enough, and you are an amazing mother.”

Well, I had regained my composure before that (several times, as a matter of fact), but I lost it, again. Luckily it was the end, and I had someone read just one final thought from President Benson and then mercifully got to sit down.

I was drained. I get a little choke-y just thinking about it.

I learned something—it’s something I know, but I needed to relearn it, and learn it with respect to my own flaws and foibles.

It was that statement—“You need to stop, because it is the devil telling you that you’re not good enough.” 

Our Heavenly Father never tells us that we are not good enough. He may, through the Spirit, tell us that we are not doing enough, but He will never make statements about who we are unless it’s to tell us that we ARE His children, that we ARE divine, that we ARE the subjects of His work and His glory.

• The devil will tell us that we are failures. He wants us to stop trying, so he will overwhelm us with all the things we aren’t doing, and use it as evidence to prove to us that we have already failed. That discouragement, that heavy weight that he piles on top of us, keeps us from moving towards God. 

          That is how we know it is not from God—if it is not encouraging us to do good, it is not from  him, but from the devil.

• The devil will try to pull you AWAY from our Heavenly Father and the Atonement. Heavenly Father and our Savior will always draw you nearer.
• The devil is going to tell you “NOTHING” you do is right. The Holy Spirit will prick your heart to work on something. Then, when you’ve mastered that, there will be something else. Always onward and upward.
• The devil will point out how you have ruined everything. The Spirit whispers “I give unto men weakness… I will make weak things become strong unto them.”

I still see so, sooooooo much I need to do to be a better mother. The difference is, that I know I can do it. Every time I stumble, I get up, I repent, and I try again. This week was better because of it. I wasn’t perfect, but I continue to try, because I know I can improve.

For anyone out there who is feeling worthless, as a mother or otherwise, I offer this scripture, along with the echo of what my friend said to me in that Relief Society class. “You need to stop.” Here’s why:

 27 And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me,then will I make weak things become strong unto them.

Our Heavenly Father and Savior love you, and they will not abandon you. Satan is big fat stupid liar, and he will do everything he can to drag you away and make you build up a wall around yourself so the Savior can’t reach His hand in to pull you out. Kick Satan in the figurative teeth, and remember.

               

God loves you. You ARE His child. You ARE divine. Our Savior will do—no, HAS ALREADY DONE—what is necessary to make it possible for you to be all that you dream to be, and more than you can imagine.

                You are already ENOUGH.