Today is one of those emotional writing days. Here's what's been going through my mind:
I think it is safe to say that everyone has those moments when they don't want to write. The very thought of sitting down in front of a computer after working all day is repulsive. It is a struggle to come up with any thoughts to jot down. You start telling yourself that you'll never be good enough, or you don't have anything new to publish. Those negative thoughts start to burrow deeper into your mind until you are paralyzed at your computer. Writer's block has fully set in.
I have plenty of these days. I fight those negative thoughts, but they always worm their way back into my mind. "Who would want to read my stuff?" or "How will I ever compete with the other writing greats?" or "What right do I have to try and break into the publishing world?"
Now, I'm not published (yet) and I'm not even close to getting an agent (yet), but I can tell you from experience, how hard writing is. Finding a good story, translating it from your brain onto a Word document, scanning for obvious errors, editing for hidden errors, bravely allowing others to read your work, saying small prayers as you email out your submissions to agencies, the feeling of your heart dropping when you get a generic rejection letter back...This is HARD! Part of me feels like, if you had the guts and spent the time to write a complete novel, then it should be published. It should be good enough for an agent to look at; for an editor to use their magic to perfect it. Unfortunately, life in the publishing world doesn't work that way.
But I know there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Trudging through all this hardship will make the the reward that much sweeter. Getting to see your name in print on your very own hardback novel, would be priceless. Seeing others reading your book in an airport lobby or requesting your book from the local library would be a dream come true. Getting kids to enjoy reading, to see your work being praised and recommended, will be worth every struggle and rejection.
I have these thoughts once a week! I finally decided I write for myself. I write what I feel called to write, and I strive to honor God with what I write. If the world pays attention, fine. If they don't, oh well. I've soothed my own heart and pleased God. :-)
ReplyDeleteYes, I'm in one of those slumps right now, and I think a big part of it is because I just read two remarkably good books- The 5th Wave and Me Before You. After reading them, I couldn't help but think, "But my book isn't this good! What's the point?" and then I didn't want to write. *sigh* Time for me to suck it up and get going!
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