Ponies, Bats, and Naan: the Post So Boring You Might Want to Skip It

Another hat

-a post by Jeanna Mason Stay

It is Tuesday afternoon. I am faced with a small amount of time that I have suddenly decided to be productive within (as opposed to watching something on Netflix, which is what I really want to do and probably exactly what I’m going to do next). It is also two days before my next MMW post.

And I have absolutely nothing to write about.

I suppose I could write about My Little Pony, which is what my children are watching right now. When I first discovered the reboot (since I grew up with it in the ‘80s), I thought, “Oh no. My kids are going to love it and I’m going to suffer through every nauseating moment.” Happily, this was not the case. My kids do love it, but I actually find it reasonably entertaining as well. And even when I don’t love it, I don’t want to rip the tv out of the wall and throw it out the window, like I do when the kids try to watch, say, Phineas and Ferb, Adventure Time, or SpongeBob (which have all been pretty much banned on account of the way they inspire my homicidal rage).

But I have nothing smart to say about My Little Pony, so I’ll move on.*

I could write about naan. I made naan this week, for the very first time. It was yummy and not too hard—though it took a long time, what with rising and all. But my ability with yeast breads is pretty much zilch, so when this one turned out I was thrilled. Granted, it didn’t taste exactly like naan the way I was expecting, but it was still delicious.

That also has nothing to do with writing or anything else.

When I lamented yesterday that I had nothing cool to say this week on MMW, my husband said, “Write about the bat!”

We ended up with a bat in my daughters’ room on Saturday night, and it was quite surprising. We think it flew into the attic through an attic vent, then when my hubby went up into the attic on Saturday afternoon, it flew down and hung out (har har) in the girls’ room until bedtime. They suddenly rushed into my room declaring that there was something “flying around in our room—we saw its shadow and we think it’s a bat.” I, of course, being the very supportive and perfect mother that I am, heaved a huge, put-upon sigh, said, “There is not a bat in your room,” and proceeded to explain how that was impossible. Finally I took them back into their room, where I just about had a heart attack when a bat swooped down from the curtain and flew around the room. (The hubby put on his shining armor and got it outside for us. Whew.)

“What would I say about the bat?” I asked my husband.

“You could talk about how sometimes you have an idea just swooping around and flying through your brain, and you can’t sleep until you get rid of it.”

“Really? That’s what you think I should write about?” I asked, disbelieving.

Okay, I know I like metaphors, but really?

It turns out, however, that I have nothing better to say. So . . . I dunno, go catch some bats or something. And write something, even if it turns out pointless (like this post). And may you have more successful ideas this week (and fewer bats) than I have had.**

*Originally I typed, “I have nothing else smart to say about My Little Pony,” but I realized that would imply that I’d actually said something smart in the first place.
**Today’s completely uninspired MMW post brought to you by Week Something-Teen of Pregnancy. Oh, and also, the stomach flu.