I went with my cousin last night to see "Fame". I was a little disappointed in the storyline. They had so many characters and plots going on that they never really developed any of them fully. But the message of the movie was great.There was one part at the end where a girl talks about the meaning of success. I have to paraprase here, but it was something about success is waking up in the morning and being excited to do what you love, it's have a group of friends that share your dream, it's working hard towards and being happy at what you accomplish.
That resonated with me. Right now, I've been letting the job I hate be the only thing I see. I haven't allowed myself to write and be happy. So I haven't been feeling success...until the last couple of days. I am pitching a children's book of mine to an agent at the online writer's conference I signed up for. I've been rewriting the story and reworking the pitch, and for the first time in awhile I do feel like a success. I'm doing it, I'm writing and I'm working towards my goal. It does light up my world, and I let myself forget that. I focused on the fact that I had been rejected by agents and that I had to get a real job that I don't like at all. I focused on the negative and I didn't let writing lift me up. I was a failure because I wasn't allowing my self to be happy during the lowpoints. I'm starting to feel that all change. I can't guarantee that I won't go back to that dark place, but hopefully next time I'll recognize it sooner and pull myself out faster.
I actually have two questions for you today. What do you think success is? Oh, and what do you think of my 100 word pitch? LOL! I definately need feedback. Keep in mind it can only be 100 words and mine is at 98. Would it get your attention? Here it is:
Imagine enjoying a gondola ride in your backyard, having chariot races on your sidewalk, or building the Tower of Pisa out of pepperoni pizza. When Drake’s mother gets sick their family comes up with an Imagination Vacation to Italy. Their wildest imaginations are realized as they encounter excitement around every corner.
Imagination Vacation to Italy is a picture book for school aged children designed to help them use their imaginations to visit the world. The book could be marketed to parents and teachers with an accompanying website where an exchange of imaginative ideas could take place.
Thanks for all your help!!
Thanks, Nikki. That post was a real pick-me-up, and I'm glad to see you moving on and finding joy in writing again.
ReplyDeleteMy manuscript has problems and problably won't be picked up, but with 12 requests based on my query, I think I've got the formula down. With yours, I'd start with removing the imagine beginning. Don't ask the reader to do anything. This makes them feel like they're working. Maybe start with "When Drake's mother gets sick..." Move the details in after that. Be bold. The idea of an accompanying website is a great idea. Make it sound so. Saying "The book COULD..." makes me feel like I'm not sure if you think it's a good idea or not. Make it sound like the greatest idea in the world. I hope I'm making sense. Thanks for sharing and putting yourself out there. Good luck!
Great pitch! I like it a lot. I can see the illustrations. I wonder if the family was planning to go to Italy before mom got sick. Can you let me know that without changing your word count?
ReplyDeleteSuccess is reaching my short-term goals, which eventually add up to my long-term goals.
Alice-good idea, I can see how that would make it stronger! Thanks so much.
ReplyDeleteRebecca-In the story the mom is just barely recovering from a bout with cancer, so I don't think the vacation was ever in the cards. Should I illustrate that a little more. I don't actually say cancer in the story, and I'm thinking of changing it to something less dramatic, but I'm not really sure. Any insights are always welcome! Thank you so much!
Nikki, I'm so excited that you're pitching your book! Be sure to let us know how it goes!
ReplyDeleteI like your story idea. I was going to suggest a change to the first sentence, but then read Alicia's comments and thought they sounded good. If you still use that first sentence somewhere I would tighten it by taking out enjoying, having, and building... "Imagine a gondola ride...chariot races...the Tower of Pisa out of pepperoni..."
ReplyDelete