This is going to be a rather informal post because of NaNoWriMo. I've been doing a lot of thinking about the post and have spoken with many of my close writer friends and we all have agreed on the same thing.
When we are so focused on writing and expect to get some in and find that we can't because of spontaneous events such as the needs of our children (even if they are regularly scheduled like making dinner) or maybe other things that are out of our control, it is that the beast of impatience, frustration and quick to anger, erupts.
I know this happens to me for sure. I feel awful when I do that because my family needs me and I let my writing take precedence over them at times and it causes problems--especially when I put my writing first. It is so hard to put it aside since I love it so much and yes, I guess I am addicted to it!
The Lord counsels all things in moderation. And we can't serve two gods. Ahem. (I'm hiding my head here!) I have pondered the importance of controlling my worldly passions (writing, writing and writing!) and the only thing I can come up with is to put a tight leash on the times when I write.
I've made it a point to keep to writing when my kids are at school and or when they are all in bed. I have to force myself to resist the temptation go past a decent hour as well. All this is done through the Lord's help of prayer and scripture reading.
I hope that I don't fall into that trap of writing over family or over the important things again (the Lord, church, friends). I don't want it to overwhelm my life and have me forget what life is really about!
I'd like to leave you with this neat verse of scripture that isn't exactly related to the topic above, but oh so fitworthy of writing--if you keep in mind your critiquing group as both receiver and contributor.
It is found in Mormon 9: 31
"Condemn me not because of mine imperfection, neither my father, because of his imperfection, neither them who have written before him; but rather give thanks unto God that he hath made manifest unto you our imperfections, that ye may learn to be more wise than we have been."
I totally relate to this post. I get so focused and then lose it when things or children interrupt me. This is a great reminding post for me. Thank you for this. Hugs, Bobbi Jo
ReplyDeleteI have the opposite problem. I let everything else come before writing then I'm angry and irritable because I didn't work harder to find the time to write. I begin to resent my family but mostly myself because I know there is time to do both I'm just not as disciplined as I should be.
ReplyDeleteDon't beat yourself up!
ReplyDeleteIt takes some time to find that balance. Remember, sacrifice is giving up something good (writing) for something better (family). You could have chosen not to get married, not to have children, but would you rather have a stack of published books to your name or your arms full of love?
I felt so liberated when I finally sat down with my schedule and blocked out a set time to write every day. I knew I would get that time every day, so I no longer crept away to the computer when I should have been doing something else. No need to get grumpy as day after day rolled by with captive stories pounding on the inside of my head, no need to feel guilty for wasting a whole Saturday trying to type out two weeks worth of stifled ideas. Even if I missed one day for an emergency, I knew I'd get my time the next day. My writing began to make slow but steady progress, and stopped interfering with the rest of my life.
Hello Rebecca!
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your thoughts! I would never, ever trade my family for a stack of published books. I agree with you, creating a schedule helps to have a balanced life, that's why I stick with mine of writing only at my expense when they are at school and after I've tucked them into bed. ;)
You hit on the constant battle within us. Motherhood is so all-consuming, it seems like whenever I take time out to write I find myself wondering if I'm neglecting some aspect of my role as mom and wife in one way or another. It's a constant balancing act, but I too believe the Lord helps us achieve it if we really want to. I decided a couple months ago I had to take some time off writing because I just wasn't finding the balance well, and as much as I love to write, my family will always come first. I've missed it, though. Thanks for your thoughts.
ReplyDeleteokay. I admit it... I'm a monster when I'm writing. GRRRR... It's why I write mostly at night and just edit during the day.
ReplyDeleteI loved your scripture. And I also love how you have great advice about balancing your life and writing. I know it can be a struggle but you seem to keep that in mind and work with it.
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