First, a disclaimer. I do NOT watch television to be instructed or even enlightened. I watch TV to be entertained. I don't even watch TV, actually, but TV shows on my computer.
But here's the thing: Heavenly Father will reach out to you in whatever way will work, especially when He has something important to share.
Lately, I've been struggling with writers' blues. Not the oh-I-got-a-bad-review or I-have-incurable-writer's-block type, but the I-can't-ever-be-good-enough-why-try-I-want-to-quit-writing variety. And it's been serious.
I've been here before, and I know it's my calling in this life--beyond family and children. I can't give up. No matter how many times I may want to. But it's just been really hard to dump this funk. Weeks. Months. I have some highs where I think I'm coming out of it, and then some crashing lows where I wonder if the writer in me is bi-polar. Or schizophrenic. Being a writer is HARD. We each have demons we face every day. And I hate to say it, but some days the demons win.
Back to television. I love the show, Castle, but this season has been really hard to watch. Lots of stupid misunderstandings, characters missing the hints, hurt feelings, and some lame storylines have made me wonder why I keep watching. And I've been pretty hard on the writers.
Then I watched the season finale. Blew. Me. Away.
As I lay in bed that night, I started thinking. (You know how it is, sometimes the only quiet time you get as a mom is when everyone else is asleep) It was like the whole season was a set up for the finale. The finale that rocked. The finale that brought everything together in a wonderful, exciting way and culminated in viewer success. Like the writers were just saying this whole season, "Wait for it. There's something better just around the corner."
And I thought, isn't that what God does for us? We're slogging through the mire in a difficult time, feeling down and thinking it's never going to get better. But He's up there saying, "Wait for it. There's something wonderful just around the corner."
I'm sharing this because I know I'm not the only one who feels down, or like a failure, or like I just can't ever be good enough. I can throw some cliches at you (we at MMW love cliches, after all ;)) like "Tough times don't last; tough people do" or "It's going to get better" but, honestly, deep down we all know that. What I do want to say is that you are NOT alone. And that I KNOW God has something really wonderful in store for you. So hang in there.